In every good achievement in life, there are certain things that needs to be done in order to get a successful results. Most people thinks its only applicable to the materialistic pursuits of life not knowing it is also emotionally applicable. Lack of understanding the natural principles will only brings a short-term relationships.
Today, a great number of people go into relationship because of the feelings they have for the opposite sex at a particular time, not knowing the major cause of their feelings at that time will determine if they are in love or not. Feelings comes by what we see, hear, read, drink or eat. It could be written words, songs, talks, drugs or the movies we watch. With the early exposure to pornographic materials most people have been mislead into relationship at a tender and at the end they fall apart, making true love unreal.
Because of the high rate at which people are rushing into relationship, and the rampart heartbreaks, have listed and properly explain the requirement one needs to possess before going into a relationship.
1. AGE: This is the first requirement anyone needs to consider before entering a relationship. There are three stages in life, we have the adolescence stage (1 - 12years) The teenage stage (13-17years) and adult stage (18years and above). In each of this stages there is a physical and mentabolical change. Not until someone is fully matured it will be an ill-advise to go into a relationship.
Nowadays, people dont consider age because of fast physiological growth and the high urge for sex. Age has a sure role to play in the prosperity of a relationship. It is not about the person that is going into the relationship but with whom they choose as a partner. How old are you? How old is he/she? Is he/she older or younger than you? Are you of same age? How old do you want to be before getting married? What is the possibility of you two getting married? If you consider the above question you will always watch whom you date to avoid heart break.
For instance, a fourteen to seventeen year old girl having an affair with a male of same age. There is a possibility of heartbreak except the teenage boy is ready to settle down in a short while.
Physically, they are still young. They arel depending on their parents and elder ones for livelihood. They might be in secondary school/ college or fresh leaves in the university which means they have dreams to acheive which will take years. Sometimes their plans might not work out which will make them to chase new dreams, delaying their marital ambition.
Another point tp consider is the area of socialiazation. They have not travel far and wide to see the beauty of life, to meet interesting people that are more better than the one they have. Because of emotional immaturity, peer pressure, and thirst to indulge in what others are doing, they fall for the best around. By the time they starts meeting new friends especially when they someone that loves them more than their first love, their feelings for the first love will decrease, making all their years in the relationship a waste.
If the relationship last longer. Once they get to twenty six, the lady is ripe for marriage but the guy might not be ready due to some personal ambitious reasons. A wise girl will find another man who is ready to settle down and marry instead of waiting for another five years for his beloved lover to acheive his plans. Knowing that beauty fades with time, and most guys will dissappoints them as they will prefer to go for younger girls than someone of same age. So age catches up with them and all their years of youthful lust and togetherness becomes a history.
Thirteen to seventeen years is not the right time to enter a relationship, it is the time to study life, study love, learn from others relationship so that you will not become a victim of heartbreak or broken homes. Become wise. After you've truely understand love and life, at eighteen you can start a relationship. So that in a short while or in the next four or six years you will be planning to get splice. And once you need a relationship that will lead to marriage don't date a guy of same age expecially someone that is not ready to settle down in a short period of time.
Even though you want to date a guy of the same age, date a well-to-do guy, someone that is planning to have you as a wife not a partime lover. Many guys are looking for companions and sex mates not wife. Date someone you can marry. Someone that is at least three or more years older than you.
Note, it is better for a twenty-four year old girl to date a twenty-four year old guy that is ready for marriage than two teens, it is better for a twenty-eight year old girl to date a twenty-four years old guy that is ready for marrriage than two teenagers. Try to be mature enough before you starts a relationship, If you plan your life well, you will have the best of love. Remember, true love is not about you choosing a partner, you need to be chose
2) EMOTIONAL MATURITY: This is another trait one needs to possess before going into a relationship. Emotional maturity has nothing to do with someone's age or the size of the body, it is an inbuilt mature character one exhibit in a particular situation, lack of it has cause a lot of broken relationship.
Emotional maturity is the ability of a person to control their emotion in time of pressure. It is your reaction to people's action. It has to do with what you think, what you say, and how you say it. If you can properly compose yourself in time of pressure and control the situation, you are emotionally mature.
An emotionally immature person can not tolerate little pressure. They are not calm, they easily paranoid. They take decisions quickly and regrets later. They don't take advise, they dont mingle with people due to inferiority complex or pride. They are easily attracted to beauty so they are easily cajole by others. They can't control their sexual urge, this characters makes them not to have a stable relationship.
The good news is, an emotionally immature person can change. The first thing is to understand yourself, know the kind of character you possess, because your character will determine whom you date. Remember it's not everybody that will like you because of your character but someone will surely appreciate you. But If you have a character that people or your lover don't like, you can change to please, and win their heart. True love is all about changes. Someone's ability to change to suit the relationship shows his/her maturity.
Try and understand your lovers character to avoid misunderstanding, know what makes them happy or sad. Make sure you study them before going into the relationship. Is he/she hot tempered or cool? Can you tolerate their way of life? study them, see if you can sail with them forever before starting a relationship.
In addition, for you to be emotionally matured you have to understand life. Love is not always rosy rosy, you need to know the kind of challenges you will face in a relationship such as financial challenges, unfaithfulness, in-laws complaint, children stress, and other unpleasant characters that might come up in the relationship. Not until you have fully understand this things and ready to face and overcome them dont go into it. But if you are ready to tolerate it, you are matured enough to go into a successful relationship.
3) FINANCIAL CAPABILITY: This is ability for someone to have enough money to take care of himself and family. Financial capability makes marriage to come earlier than expected. Some people believes money is not that important in a relationship but love. I quite agree with them, love should come first, money is also very important.
Money beautifies love, it actualises love words. It secures the heart, it might even save a life. A man that expresses his love with love words only in due time becomes a sounding brass.
Study youthful couples that got properly married, they have a sustainable wealth. If some have money and his ripe for marriage nothing stops them... but once there is no money to even feed yourself talkless of to feed another person you will be afraid to get marry because you dont want to marry your lover into suffering.
Financial incapability has lead to abortive love. It causes abortion, broken homes and untimely death of our loveones. It has mislead most hearts to go into relationship they ought not to have enter. It makes a person to date the available not the desirable, and as soon as they become financially capable they throw the old partner away and go for their true choice.
As a guy make sure you plan your life well to be in wealth at an appropriate time. Draft the age you want to be before getting married, work now and make it happen. Money attracts many eyes, If you have it you will be able to have a choice, go for them and start a successive relationship. But once you dont have money any lady can serve.
As a girl, learn to watch whom you date. Date someone that can fulfil your needs if not now, in the nearest future. Know the kind of home you want to have, date someone that can make it happen. Never date a lazy person, someone that dream and talk big but will not make a move at it. Mind whom you date before time goes off you.
4) MOTIVES: This is the last requirement one needs to consider before going into a relationship. Motive have properly been discuss in one of my article "the reasons of going into a relationship"
Motive is your major purpose of someone going into a relationship. What is your motive of entering that relationship? What is your partners motive? A successful romantic relationship is a relationship that will lead to marriage. So, the only motive that should be your mind if you want to have a successful relationship is marriage. How many people in a relationship today have this mindset? Everybody wants to have fun forgeting their tommorow. If you dont have marriage as you motive, that relationship can break at any time. That's why I always advise, date someone you can marry....
If you can possess the above characters you can go into a relationship, it wll turns out well.
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